Are you experienced?

---

DO YOU LIVE FOR ADVENTURE? ARE YOU TIRED OF BEING CALLED "APATHETIC?" PROVE THEM ALL WRONG BY TAKING OUR BACKPAGE ADVENTUREQUEST(TM) QUIZ.

COMPLETE THE FOLLOWING.

1. YOU HAVE BEEN TO

A) A CATHOLIC STUDENT CENTER MASS OR A CCC MEETING

B) A BAHA'I OR PAGAN MEETING

C) ALL OF THE ABOVE

D) I AM TOO COOL FOR RELIGION

2. YOU HAVE

A) SEEN A MEMBER OF THE PREFERRED SEX NUDE

B) SEEN ONE OF YOUR PROFS NUDE

C) SEEN YOUR MASTERS NUDE

D) YOU DON'T EVEN LOOK AT YOURSELF NUDE

3. YOU HAVE DRUNK

A) A BEER

B) A SHOT OF LIQUOR

C) WITH BOB TRUSCOTT

D) TEETOTALERS RULE!

4. WHEN YOU ARE AT A PARTY YOU

A) STAND BY THE WALL

B) STAND BY THE KEG OR BAR

C) DANCE

D) GRAB SOME ANIMAL CRACKERS AND LEAVE

5. FROM A POLICE LINEUP, YOU COULD IDENTIFY

A) YOUR MASTERS

B) SNC

C) NEILL BINFORD

D) WHO ARE THOSE PEOPLE?

6. AT 10 P.M. ON THE 13TH, 26TH OR 31ST YOU CAN BE FOUND

A) WAITING WITH A BUCKET OF WATER

B) WAITING WITH A FIRE HOSE AND A CAMERA

C) RUNNING 13

D) IN THE LIBRARY

7. SOMETIMES YOU GO TO THE ROCKS

A) FOR LATE NIGHT CHATS

B) WITH A DATE

C) HOPING YOUR DATE HAS A CONDOM

D) 45DEG. IS ACUTE, 90DEG. IS RIGHT, 180DEG. IS OBTUSE

8. THERE IS A TEST TOMORROW! YOU

A) RUN TO FONDREN

B) PULL AN ALL-NIGHTER

C) SKIM THE READINGS AND B.S.

D) CHEAT BECAUSE YOU SUCK

9. YOU KNOW YOU ARE SOCIAL BECAUSE

A) YOU'VE ACTUALLY MADE IT TO A BROWN COLLEGE PARTY (IF YOU ARE FROM BROWN, READ "GONE TO A PARTY AT ANOTHER COLLEGE")

B) YOU HAVE PERFECT PUB ATTENDANCE

C) YOU HAVE FRIENDS AT EVERY COLLEGE

D) YOU HAVE A SOCIAL DISEASE

10. YOU ARE A HARD-CORE SPORTS FAN BECAUSE

A) YOU'VE BEEN TO A RICE FOOTBALL GAME

B) YOU PLAY INTRAMURALS

C) YOU GO TO RICE WOMEN'S BASKETBALL GAMES

D) STUDENT TICKETS TO RICE GAMES ARE TOO EXPENSIVE FOR YOU TO ATTEND THE GAMES

11. YOUR LIFE AT RICE IS FILLED WITH ADVENTURES LIKE

A) TACO CABANA

B) RUNNING 13, STEAMTUNNELING OR SWIMMING IN
RUPP'S POOL

C) AMOROUS EXCURSIONS IN THE ACADEMIC BUILDINGS

D) STUDY ROOM 452 HAS YOUR NAME ON IT

12. YOU LOVE YOUR COLLEGE SO MUCH THAT

A) YOU KNOW THE COLLEGE CHEERS

B) YOU ATTEND COLLEGE CABINET MEETINGS

C) YOU RIDE FOR YOUR COLLEGE AT BEER-BIKE

D) YOU EAT AND SLEEP THERE

SCORING:

* A = 1, B = 2, C = 3, D = 0

BONUS POINTS

* SCORE TWO POINTS IF YOU'VE EVER SUBMITTED MISCLASS.

* SCORE ONE POINT IF YOU'VE RUN THE OUTER LOOP; TWO POINTS IF YOU RAN IT WITHIN THE PAST WEEK.

* SCORE ONE POINT IF YOU'VE EVER GOT AN "A" ON A TEST YOU DID NOT STUDY FOR; TWO POINTS IF YOU DID NOT GLOAT.

* SCORE TWO POINTS FOR EACH SEMESTER SPENT ABROAD; ONE POINT FOR EACH SUMMER ABROAD.

0-13. YOU SUCK. PLEASE TRANSFER BEFORE ALL RICE TRADITION IS WIPED OUT. THE IVY LEAGUE NEEDS YOU.

14-25. KEEP UP THE EFFORT. THERE IS A GRAND PATH AHEAD OF YOU.

26-35. THE ADMISSIONS COMMITTEE SHOULD STUDY YOU (EVEN IF YOU PLAY RUGBY). WE RESPECT YOU FOR YOUR JOIE DE VIVRE.

36 OR MORE . WAY TO GO. YOU ARE EITHER AT THE HIGHEST
LEVEL OF ADVENTURE-SEEKING, OR YOU ARE A PERVERT. WE ADVISE YOU TO GET HIV-TESTED.

This item appeared in the Backpage section of the February 16, 1996 issue.

Copyright © 1996 The Rice Thresher. All Rights Reserved.
This document may be distributed electronically, provided that it is distributed in its entirety and includes this notice. However, it cannot be reprinted without the express written permission of:
The Rice Thresher, Rice University, 6100 Main, Houston, TX, 77005, USA.