Soligo Misclass

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Soligo Misclass

"But Brito's from Brownsville you see ... they do things differently down there."

--Dr. Soligo ECON 430

"Does anybody know what B.O. is? It when you can still smell your armpits, but you don't know if you stink."

--Dr. Soligo ECON 430

"I know if I had one drink too many, I'll just turn left and avoid Bellaire Blvd."

--Dr. Soligo ECON 430.

"What about since its so cold outside, you tend to jump under the covers quicker."

--Dr. Soligo, ECON 430 defending why there might be more procreation in the northern latitudes.

"I need to get drunk before my class tonight so my students can submit misclass on me."

--Dr. Soligo at the Cohen House.

Q:What's the difference between a Rice student and a slave?

A: A slave must be beaten into submission. A Rice student must be beaten into submitting Misclass.

"How many letters are there in English? 50 something? If we go to infinity, we run out.

--Dr. Gao, MATH 222.

"Do you ever look at the top of your dresser with awe and say `My God! This is miracle!"

--Dr. Benjamin, RELI 241.

"Well, if I'm not authentically me, who am I? Am I the Gorton Fisherman?"

--Dr. Crowell, PHIL 508.

"This is true on average, the average holds. The trees grow upside down. They're Australian trees.

--Dr. Ernst, COMP 212.

"I know it's cold in here. I have my hand on my penis."

--Wiess Freshman.

"Death due to an electric shock is fast and permanent."

--ELEC 241/242 Lab Handbook.

"Scientists are rhetoricians in qualitative drag."

--Dr. Reiser, UNIV 302.

"So what was I saying again ... oh yeah, Ritalin."

--Baker Sophomore.

"No, this example is not in the textbook. I'm not going to make things that easy for you. Yeah, you. I heard you, talking about how easy that first test was. That's why when everyone gets burnt on the next test, they'll all be pointing their fingers at YOU. Laugh at my test while watching a baseball game, hah."

--Dr. Ensor, STAT 280.

"Just f**king shut-up and get to work."

-- Most of the Thresher Editorial Board.

"I already did Lovett."

-- SA Incumbent Maryana Iskander.

"You little piece of evil."

-- Former WRC first lady, Jila Bakker.

"How's this for a shameless plug? I'll just say something stupid about O-Week and how everyone should come apply at Jones ... but we probably couldn't print that. Or could we?"

-- Kos.

Isn't it ironic? We could.

"Why not?"

-- Ryan Levy after being asked if he planned to keep both his Honor Council and U. Court seats.

"Endorse me as Sammy the Owl."

-- Dave Gordon, candidate for Sammy.

Not a problem, Gordo. Especially since you guys are running unopposed. Just watch out for Moniaci and the new "demerits for intoxication" clause in the Sammy constitution.

"If you had any guts, you would stick your head out that window and show your face."

-- Dr. Minter, Jones College Master responding to some hooligans that shot a bottle rocket at him and his dog during spring break.

Give 'em hell, Dave!

This item appeared in the Backpage section of the March 15, 1996 issue.

Copyright © 1996 The Rice Thresher. All Rights Reserved.
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