'Far Side Wins! Far Side Wins!'

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by Marty Beard and Shay Gilmore

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The ingredients were simple: flatbed trucks, T-shirts, bikes and an inordinate amount of rubber and water. Picture this: hundreds of colored, water-filled Latex missiles aiming for any vital part of you and yours, knocking the wind out of a lucky few. Everyone on Brown College's truck became soaked through, their drab "Indiana Brown" shirts clinging like wet, loose second skins.

Some were privileged enough to acquire the green wristband that gained them admittance to the pit during the women's race. Those from Brown saw their college led to victory by Hilary Grabe and Ania Mitros, who paced Brown with bike times of 1:26 and 1:28, respectively. When the last Brown biker crossed the line, anyone nearby found herself dizzily hugging and getting hugged by every tan-shirted person in her path.

The men's race, a "flawless" victory for Jones College, was an impressive display of the power of the well-oiled Jones Beer-Bike machine. Arthur Langham pushed back a 1.97--second chug, and bikers came out of the pit as fast as the crew could set them up. For Jones junior and bike captain Mike Hardy, this year's Beer-Bike carried with it a lot of inner significance. "As a freshman, I biked for the first time in my life, and I watched as Jones failed to come up with a much-desired three-peat. Last year, I saw us come within a fraction of a second of victory. ... I knew that this time it was personal and that we were not going to be stopped," he said.

After the revelry, the victory lap and the incessant ear-splitting shouts, Jones headed over to Gillis' pool. Once there, Brown and Jones experienced a rare moment of solidarity as the two colleges cried, "Far side rules! Far side rules!" President Malcolm Gillis came out to partake in the exhibition, and the afternoon continued in a haze of water, chanting and camaraderie.

-- Marty Beard, Brown '98 and Shay Gilmore, Jones '98

This item appeared in the Features section of the April 12, 1996 issue.

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